You can't say happiness without saying penis.
I figure, in light of the recent events that are currently taking place. Although I am very much "seeing red" this Valentines day, I have a funny story for you.
I used to work at Tweeter and have been hanging out with some of my old friends from there (although I deserve to be chastised for abandoning them). We were at the bar last night scoping out for strange (what an utter dissapointment that was). Isn't it interesting that when you go to the bar to meet girls, you meet the kind of girls that hang out in bars. I was there with two of my closest guy friends, Justin and Shawn. Justin is great friend of mine for years and he is telling me this story and I swear Bacardi shot outta my nose. So, for your reading pleasure:
Justin was riding down the street with this guy Richard. Richard is a yo boy from England. I swear to GOD that is like Ali G. He has a Neon and listens to Ja Rule and Lil Jon while driving. He has sparkly paint on the car that glitters in the sunlight!
Anyways, I digress. They are driving down the road and out of nowhere, some jerk cuts them off without using a blinker! (I hate when that happens!) Apparently I don't hate it more than Richard the Wiganker.
Richard speeds up to get next to this guy and Justin is about to yell, "Nice Blinker asshsole!" but before he can get it out, Richard yells out the window to the guy (I SHIT YOU NOT!) "Nice Indicator!"
Nice indicator!
Nice fucking indicator!
That is how you say blinker in England!
Justin cryed laughing
I cryed laughing
it was the first time I laughed that hard in months......so rich!
Now Shawn's story:
Seeing as how it is impossible to find a girl in North AA county w/o kids or tattoos, my friend, Shawn is dating this girl named Brandy and she has a lot of kids(conceived in marriage at least). Like 4 I think. Her uterus is about to fall out anyway. But she has trouble finding babysitters that can watch them all. Shawn being the sweet guy that he is makes reservations for tonight at Ruth's Chris and has a major gift card. She needs to bail on him though. So he has decided to treat me to a romantic V-day dinner at R.C.'s The humor is this :
Imagine two guys sitting together on V-day having dinner together at a fancy restaurant. That is the dictionary definition of FAG. LOL
I used to work at Tweeter and have been hanging out with some of my old friends from there (although I deserve to be chastised for abandoning them). We were at the bar last night scoping out for strange (what an utter dissapointment that was). Isn't it interesting that when you go to the bar to meet girls, you meet the kind of girls that hang out in bars. I was there with two of my closest guy friends, Justin and Shawn. Justin is great friend of mine for years and he is telling me this story and I swear Bacardi shot outta my nose. So, for your reading pleasure:
Justin was riding down the street with this guy Richard. Richard is a yo boy from England. I swear to GOD that is like Ali G. He has a Neon and listens to Ja Rule and Lil Jon while driving. He has sparkly paint on the car that glitters in the sunlight!
Anyways, I digress. They are driving down the road and out of nowhere, some jerk cuts them off without using a blinker! (I hate when that happens!) Apparently I don't hate it more than Richard the Wiganker.
Richard speeds up to get next to this guy and Justin is about to yell, "Nice Blinker asshsole!" but before he can get it out, Richard yells out the window to the guy (I SHIT YOU NOT!) "Nice Indicator!"
Nice indicator!
Nice fucking indicator!
That is how you say blinker in England!
Justin cryed laughing
I cryed laughing
it was the first time I laughed that hard in months......so rich!
Now Shawn's story:
Seeing as how it is impossible to find a girl in North AA county w/o kids or tattoos, my friend, Shawn is dating this girl named Brandy and she has a lot of kids(conceived in marriage at least). Like 4 I think. Her uterus is about to fall out anyway. But she has trouble finding babysitters that can watch them all. Shawn being the sweet guy that he is makes reservations for tonight at Ruth's Chris and has a major gift card. She needs to bail on him though. So he has decided to treat me to a romantic V-day dinner at R.C.'s The humor is this :
Imagine two guys sitting together on V-day having dinner together at a fancy restaurant. That is the dictionary definition of FAG. LOL
posted by the diz at 1:32 PM
7 Comments:
omg HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
wiganker
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
okay, back to reading the story...whew
omg i want steak...
enjoy dinner christopher!! you guys should hold hands and look at each other longingly just for good measure ;)
ps. i think i will now use the phrase "nice indicator" joined with a scowl when i'm displeased with something...
GREAT! that makes it all worth it! thanks for the comments.They always make me feel better.
Oh thats a good one. I love Brits!
At least he didnt yell some sort of spell at them: "Alohamora!"
I hope you enjoyed your romantic dinner! You are pretty much the only one I know who had one, haha. Awwwwwww...so sweet!
That bitch cancelled on me actually!
Wiganker is definitely one for the books.
Indicator...the Brits call it what it is. We call it what it does...like three year olds...it blinks so it's a blinker. Hahahaha.
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